All Those Tentacles Tuesday Surf & Culture Report
Lost Boys & Co...
In the morning you're steaming down to the beach and there are some indicators that start to get you interested. There's some sun - yes, that's good. Visibility is 10 miles or so - yes, that's nice. Then you see the stacks - and they're blowing offshore - this is very good! Our estimate is that photo 1. shows an offshore flow of about 2.3kts. So you get down to our checkout point at the bottom of Sapphire and you now see that the sea surface is smooth to glassy and there are some nice little waves coming through. Of course you can't see that the air temperature is 53.3° and that the water is 57.6°, but you're prepared and checked on those things before you left. You also checked the tides and they said it was low tide at 9:59am +0.2' and high tide at 5:10pm +4.0'. The 46221 buoy told you there was a SSW swell out of 200° coming in at 3.6', but now you can see that it's really 3' to 4' and the tide is starting to dredge things a bit. Whatever happens you know it can't get any lower than it will be at 10am, which, considering the swell, is damned low enough. What you will find, is that the inside is really shallow and you will get a free macro-derm-abrasion treatment every time you fall. You look gorgeous with that newly abraded skin... Soft too...
There are two principal beers in Portugal. Sagres and Super Bock. SB is on sale at BevMo. Fig. 3 will help with the ID. (Thank you, Big Wave Dave...)
In case you thought we were through with the paraprosdokians...
11. Dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish.
12. I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted pay checks.
13. Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says "In an emergency, notify:" I put "Doctor".
14. I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
15. Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.
16. You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.
In the morning you're steaming down to the beach and there are some indicators that start to get you interested. There's some sun - yes, that's good. Visibility is 10 miles or so - yes, that's nice. Then you see the stacks - and they're blowing offshore - this is very good! Our estimate is that photo 1. shows an offshore flow of about 2.3kts. So you get down to our checkout point at the bottom of Sapphire and you now see that the sea surface is smooth to glassy and there are some nice little waves coming through. Of course you can't see that the air temperature is 53.3° and that the water is 57.6°, but you're prepared and checked on those things before you left. You also checked the tides and they said it was low tide at 9:59am +0.2' and high tide at 5:10pm +4.0'. The 46221 buoy told you there was a SSW swell out of 200° coming in at 3.6', but now you can see that it's really 3' to 4' and the tide is starting to dredge things a bit. Whatever happens you know it can't get any lower than it will be at 10am, which, considering the swell, is damned low enough. What you will find, is that the inside is really shallow and you will get a free macro-derm-abrasion treatment every time you fall. You look gorgeous with that newly abraded skin... Soft too...
There are two principal beers in Portugal. Sagres and Super Bock. SB is on sale at BevMo. Fig. 3 will help with the ID. (Thank you, Big Wave Dave...)
In case you thought we were through with the paraprosdokians...
11. Dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish.
12. I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted pay checks.
13. Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says "In an emergency, notify:" I put "Doctor".
14. I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
15. Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.
16. You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.
"When the surf breaks, we'll fix it..."
The Professor!!
